Jealousy comes from counting others’ blessings instead of your own’
I think jealousy in every form is a dangerous emotion. It consumes, distracts and is not a positive emotion but let’s be real, we all get jealous. That green eyed monster raises its head once or twice…a month? a week?? A day??? Damn girl green is not your colour!
There’s so many things around us that cause us to get jealous right? Social media doesn’t help in the slightest. Like if you check out my Instagram *shameless plug* you will see me looking all kinds of fly, you know. My face is snatched, my edges laid, everything is on point. What you don’t see is me typing this post right now basically looking like a glorified tramp. It doesn’t help that I have a cold. My wig is off, my cornrows are dusty. I’m braless walking around with my boobs around my ankles, ok that is wayyyy too much information!
What point am I trying to make? Jealousy is a dangerous emotion because your jealousy isn’t based on 100% truth, a lot of it is 50% truth plus 50% what you want to see. Some of you might have gotten jealous of people showing their baes and flowers on Valentines Day when you have no idea what goes on behind closed doors. In fact you probably do know that the reality of a relationship is hard work, compromise and not just about public displays of affection but yet you still choose to entertain that jealous emotion.
Some of us, its career goals or perceived success. You get jealous of how ‘successful’ someone else is, completely ignoring the fact that it is likely that they worked hard to get where they are and made several sacrifices. Sacrifices that you wouldn’t be prepared to make. Also, if that ‘successful’ person told you time and time again about their struggles, some of y’all would still be jealous! Why? Because jealousy is a self centered emotion. It’s about me and what I don’t have.
Don’t get me started about jealousy amongst women. Nope you cannot see another woman doing well without feeling those familiar pangs of jealousy which distracts you from your own goals. You then start to focus on what she is doing and wanting what she has. Even if that other woman is a sister, a friend. It even in a weird way starts to make you feel bad about yourself because then comparison sets in. It now becomes about how bad you are doing, how discouraged you feel. You almost prefer it when she isn’t doing as well so you can wallow in self pity together. Misery loves company. Remember what I said about jealousy being a self centred thing?
You know what? We need to sort it out. I need to sort myself out and take a long hard look in the mirror. Instead of being jealous, let me try to genuinely happy when someone is doing well or is happy. Let me ignore those negative feelings that threaten to come up. We are not in a competition, we all experience things differently and at different times. The world would be a better place if you decided to be truly happy for someone and you faced your goals.
Sure someone could motivate and inspire you but to feel jealous about that person achieving their goals or being happy? Nah girl get it together! Focus on achieving your dream and goals for 2017. Ain’t nobody got time for jealousy. It shouldn’t even be in your vocabulary!